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Planned Parent Parentinghood

Planned Parent Parentinghood

At a time when a quarter of households in this country are caring for an older family member we all need to have more information and a plan. An old friend used to say there is no such thing as planned parenthood, because until you do it you have no idea what you're in for and therefore  there is no way to plan!  Funny and True.  I am reminded of this daily sometimes hourly as I become more and more the parent to my parent. No time now to plan, have to improvise. Had I known or imagined this might...

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The Sandwich Generation

The Sandwich Generation

In 2015 Dana Larsen wrote a Senior Living Blog titled What is the Sandwich Generation? Family members, predominantly female family members, have provided the majority of care to their aging loved ones. Today, there is a generation of middle-aged adults, known as the Sandwich Generation, who are caught between the demands of child rearing in addition to providing care to their aging parents." There are several reasons why this is happening : primarily, people are living longer and having children later. However there is another variable that creates a different and more complex sandwich.   There is large new part of...

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Multi Generational Housing is on the Rise

Multi Generational Housing is on the Rise

        For millennia homes housed more than just the nuclear family, it's still true in what we describe as traditional cultures. In the United States and elsewhere  recently more and more families are returning to this tradition, multi generations ( two and often three generations) living together.  There are many different reasons this happens: due to economics, need for care, the housing shortage,  sometimes a combination of factors drive the choice. Anyone who has done it by default or desire knows it is can be a challenge, very complicated and equally rewarding. Remarkably this trend is not just older...

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My Hip Fracture

My Hip Fracture

This one is personal, last Monday I fractured my hip. Not as you might imagine from being older, out of shape, fragile boned ( though we'll  have to wait for a bone density scan to be certain  ... possibly to be continued?) or all of the aforementioned, BUT from stopping a dog fight, flying through the air like a cartoon character and landing directly on the pavement on my hip. The owners of the dog I failed to shield my dog from, asked if I was ok, offered to help me up, I demurred, saying I was just a touch shaken...

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Improvisation as Caregiving Technique

Improvisation as Caregiving Technique

Life is rarely linear. We imagine and try to impose order, but really who are we kidding? When my children were young I always felt as though I were improvising. Sometimes it seemed I was in a sweet spot and no matter the complexities things would just turn out right, other times not so much. And there were those perfect storm days that felt like unmitigated disaster.  Reading Michelle Woo's How to Parent like an Improv Actor  I realized there are some great lessons here for those of us caring for older adults.  Don’t fear silence  Andrea Wetherald, an improv...

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